My body continued to show many signs that I was in labor, and then contractions would stop. There is a name for this kind of labor but I can't remember (prodromal labor). On Friday, May 8th I went to my midwife appointment feeling like things might be nearing the end (in pregnancy that is). I chose not to be checked since I had a long drive home with four kids and I didn't want to chance going into full blown labor while trying to manage traffic.
Saturday morning arrived. Caleb advised that I call the midwife team. So I did. They came at 4pm in the afternoon while I was having irregular contractions but those contractions were good ones because I was 8cm when they got here! After a couple hours of walking around, eating dinner and roasted marshmallows, climbing stairs, I was checked and fully dilated. But still no desire to push and no regular contractions.
On the toilet I went. When the first tricky contraction came I knew it would be REALLY fast. I had no desire to have the baby in our nasty looking bright green bathroom so I walked over the my bed where the team was waiting there. I stood at the side of my bed and crouched down with each pushing contraction. As I felt a head come, everything in me wanted it to stop but I made a choice to use all power to push our baby out. My mind was so focused that I had no idea where anyone was. Caleb later told me that he was right there next to me but I have no remembrance of that. So I pushed my baby out standing near the bed and my midwife immediately gave her to me. I was so surprised that she was a girl!
I am so blessed to be given another wonderful birth experience. God clearly told me to just TRUST as I had doubts when contractions were not regular. He was in my home and planned every moment from start to finish.
Ariane Nasia Lange is her name. And we love her.
Wednesday, May 27, 2015
Tuesday, May 12, 2015
Our New Life
How does one begin a birth story? At conception? At 20 week gestation? At the first knowings of the beginning of labor? After all, God himself had this life planned since the very beginning of time. And I stood on that while some wondered why on earth would I welcome another baby after having four prior in a short time. I don't have to defend myself and point out scripture and go deep down into why I believe my sweet butterball squishy girl was meant to be because I know without a shadow of a doubt that she always was.
God planted this peanut into my womb before we even moved and we kept it between husband and wife for sometime. We wanted to keep our news to ourselves for a bit and share when led (and obviously when people saw some growth happening!).
The pregnancy went so well with some struggles towards the end. At 30ish weeks the itching started and grew very strong. It was determined that I had PUPPS and was only going to go away after the baby was delivered. There were long nights of physical discomfort and frustration when I didn't even know how to pray. I had to make a decision to thank God for this baby when the itching was unbearable. This season was the start of an amazing lesson of what God really means when he says that joy comes after thanksgiving.
I decided not to really look to my due date as fact. Especially since all my children have been 10 days or more past that set date. But as that "date" approached, my body began to give signs that baby would come maybe before the 10-days-late day. We suspected that this one was a boy for a few reasons. Midwives, siblings, and parents all called baby "he" while I thought of potential boy names.
(To be completed when baby snoozes and others are occupied...)
God planted this peanut into my womb before we even moved and we kept it between husband and wife for sometime. We wanted to keep our news to ourselves for a bit and share when led (and obviously when people saw some growth happening!).
The pregnancy went so well with some struggles towards the end. At 30ish weeks the itching started and grew very strong. It was determined that I had PUPPS and was only going to go away after the baby was delivered. There were long nights of physical discomfort and frustration when I didn't even know how to pray. I had to make a decision to thank God for this baby when the itching was unbearable. This season was the start of an amazing lesson of what God really means when he says that joy comes after thanksgiving.
I decided not to really look to my due date as fact. Especially since all my children have been 10 days or more past that set date. But as that "date" approached, my body began to give signs that baby would come maybe before the 10-days-late day. We suspected that this one was a boy for a few reasons. Midwives, siblings, and parents all called baby "he" while I thought of potential boy names.
(To be completed when baby snoozes and others are occupied...)
Wednesday, February 11, 2015
And it goes on
And then one July day, an offer was made on the house. One that would ensure a break even walk away (not counting all the repairs and upgrades!). Our Realtor was skeptical that the appraisal would back the offer up. "It doesn't mean anything if the appraisal doesn't match...". Glorious. Just glorious. I was told to get the kids out of the house when the lady came to see how much our house was worth. But I stayed. I'm glad that I did. When she said "If you had an air conditioner in that top bedroom, then I could count it..." I was there to tell her where it was. The appraisal went through!
It was July 4th weekend and we needed to find a place to live in Fredericksburg. We searched that weekend and put in an offer on a dumpy foreclosure (and won!). Oh it needed lots of work and smelled of cigarettes but we are young and love to see potential.
The sale on the Richmond house was smooth and went through the first week of August. The backlog on our new house was weeks away.
We would be homeless for a month (so we thought!) but some great friends stepped up, laid down their lives, and welcomed us in. We each have four kids to our name, 8 combined. We chipped in with meals and made it work wonderfully and can still say that we're friends today! Our friends really showed us what it means to sacrifice to help others. To go outside of their comfort zone to help (love) a neighbor.
So one month turned into three. The government is not known for being quick with paperwork that's for sure! On Oct. 3rd, we closed and had the open door to start working on our new "smoke house".
The kids helped us rip up nasty carpet and pull thousands of staples.
Wall paper coming down in the dining room and kitchen.
We all worked HARD to make the new place "livable"
This is how we lived for a few weeks. But looking back, it really was a short season.
So glad this guy is the handiest thing ever!
It was July 4th weekend and we needed to find a place to live in Fredericksburg. We searched that weekend and put in an offer on a dumpy foreclosure (and won!). Oh it needed lots of work and smelled of cigarettes but we are young and love to see potential.
The sale on the Richmond house was smooth and went through the first week of August. The backlog on our new house was weeks away.
We would be homeless for a month (so we thought!) but some great friends stepped up, laid down their lives, and welcomed us in. We each have four kids to our name, 8 combined. We chipped in with meals and made it work wonderfully and can still say that we're friends today! Our friends really showed us what it means to sacrifice to help others. To go outside of their comfort zone to help (love) a neighbor.
So one month turned into three. The government is not known for being quick with paperwork that's for sure! On Oct. 3rd, we closed and had the open door to start working on our new "smoke house".
Wall paper coming down in the dining room and kitchen.
So glad this guy is the handiest thing ever!
Tuesday, December 30, 2014
Feelings get out
After walking in upset feelings for a couple days (and it seemed like those feelings continued to build with each passing hour since I felt that he should have been the one to address things) I spoke up before the sun had a chance to go down. I told husband that I couldn't do this anymore. That I felt like a single parent and that his job was taking over etc. etc.
He listened and responded.
"I don't like this either. I don't like being away from our kids and driving 3 hours a day. It's so hard and I can't do this without you. It's going to be a hard two years. When we are debt free then we are free and can live differently."
I told him that I was with him and his vision. But not at the cost of our marriage. We can either be stronger in two years or have a strained relationship.
At the end of the evening we were chipper and smiling and happy. My husband and I were not the only one's in the room that night. Jesus was there and I learned it's never good to walk in pride and in my own strength.
The next day I went to a homeschool convention. The very first session was on marriage and presented by the guy who wrote "Sacred Marriage". Here are my takeaways from that day:
1) God didn't put you in a marriage for you to be loved. Jesus already gives you all the love you need. He put you in a marriage to learn HOW to love and ultimately be more like Him.
2) Yep, you are God's daughter and He is your father but don't forget that your husband is God's son which also makes God your father-in-law.
This all happened in June 2014. We waited as people looked at our house and we looked in Fredericksburg for a new one.
He listened and responded.
"I don't like this either. I don't like being away from our kids and driving 3 hours a day. It's so hard and I can't do this without you. It's going to be a hard two years. When we are debt free then we are free and can live differently."
I told him that I was with him and his vision. But not at the cost of our marriage. We can either be stronger in two years or have a strained relationship.
At the end of the evening we were chipper and smiling and happy. My husband and I were not the only one's in the room that night. Jesus was there and I learned it's never good to walk in pride and in my own strength.
The next day I went to a homeschool convention. The very first session was on marriage and presented by the guy who wrote "Sacred Marriage". Here are my takeaways from that day:
1) God didn't put you in a marriage for you to be loved. Jesus already gives you all the love you need. He put you in a marriage to learn HOW to love and ultimately be more like Him.
2) Yep, you are God's daughter and He is your father but don't forget that your husband is God's son which also makes God your father-in-law.
This all happened in June 2014. We waited as people looked at our house and we looked in Fredericksburg for a new one.
Thursday, December 11, 2014
Part 2 of Many
I think it was finally May before we finished the kitchen and were ready to put our first bought home on the market. Does anyone remember the picture that I posted of the counter top that was wedged between the kitchen walls at a tilt? haha! I was SO angry that night. We paid a guy to do the counters but he didn't show up so husband contracted his wife to help him put it in. I remember texting my SIL FURIOUS! Well, we finished it. Our dear Philly friends helped a TON in this whole process. I took the kids to live there on more than one occasion while Mr. Philly drive to Richmond to help husband. We were not alone for sure.
Husband found a fancy realtor in Richmond that was recommended by a coworker. He came, looked at our house and complimented us on the improvements. BUT he didn't believe that we would walk away without owing the bank. He didn't think it would appraise for what we needed to walk away without gain or loss. We remained steadfast though.
The house was on the market for two months and had a handful of views. In the process there was one offer WAY below what we were asking. I honestly felt offended. Like it was a personal shot at us after all that work. Sounds funny.
While the house was on the market for those two months, husband continued his job venture while I continued my wife, mom, and at-home-business venture. I really struggled, mostly because that belief that the new position took presidency over me. In May I went on a trip to PA and then to VT. I was gone for about 10 days while husband worked 15 hr days. When I got home, I remember preparing this meal with great hopes that he would be home in time for dinner since we were gone so long. When I called to see where he was, he was still sitting at the office, 1.25 hrs away. Kids were crying and I was crushed. I'm not writing this to reveal my husband's mistakes. I ran out of grace and was trying to rely on myself to push through it all.
When he got home, I was in bed and I had NO idea how to not "let the sun go down upon my wrath". Especailly when he didn't say a word when he got home. The next night he still never said anything and I decided that it was up to me to speak up.
Continued another day...
Husband found a fancy realtor in Richmond that was recommended by a coworker. He came, looked at our house and complimented us on the improvements. BUT he didn't believe that we would walk away without owing the bank. He didn't think it would appraise for what we needed to walk away without gain or loss. We remained steadfast though.
The house was on the market for two months and had a handful of views. In the process there was one offer WAY below what we were asking. I honestly felt offended. Like it was a personal shot at us after all that work. Sounds funny.
While the house was on the market for those two months, husband continued his job venture while I continued my wife, mom, and at-home-business venture. I really struggled, mostly because that belief that the new position took presidency over me. In May I went on a trip to PA and then to VT. I was gone for about 10 days while husband worked 15 hr days. When I got home, I remember preparing this meal with great hopes that he would be home in time for dinner since we were gone so long. When I called to see where he was, he was still sitting at the office, 1.25 hrs away. Kids were crying and I was crushed. I'm not writing this to reveal my husband's mistakes. I ran out of grace and was trying to rely on myself to push through it all.
When he got home, I was in bed and I had NO idea how to not "let the sun go down upon my wrath". Especailly when he didn't say a word when he got home. The next night he still never said anything and I decided that it was up to me to speak up.
Continued another day...
Saturday, November 29, 2014
New Seasons are hard - The Beginning
It all started last year when husband's larger ups at work began talking about a possibility in a huge jump for him in his career. When I first heard mutterings of a chance that he would be an office manager somewhere else other than Richmond, I quite honestly sort of passed it by. Change is inevitable right? We all go through it sooner or later so why should I really meditate on it?
I continued to live life while mothering my four bandits, there was plenty around to stay occupied. In December, 2013 changes really started becoming "real". We ripped out chimneys and walls and floors all in the attempt to make our house sell-able. We hired help...never. People helped and husband prooved his handyman skills.
When our kitchen was gutted, I remember really being stretched. Cooking dinners in the bathroom for two months (things take longer when you do as you have the moola) put me over the edge more times than one. I promised myself that I would NEVER complain about doing dishes in the kitchen again after this. "Stay positive Melissa! You have running water!" kept going through my mind. In the mornings I had to choose to have a good attitude which was hard. My poor husband was working his tail off at work and in our house and I couldn't shake that we were working so hard just to sell our place.
Then in March, 2014 husband started his new job as a branch manager and commuted to his new office 1.25 hrs from our house. This is when my attitude slipped further and further down the crabby lane. His days were so long and I was so tired and I didn't want to be a happy wife when he came home 15 min before the kids go to bed. I'm just being honest here. I believed that this new job came before me and failed to see that he was working for us. For our family and our goals.
To be continued...
I continued to live life while mothering my four bandits, there was plenty around to stay occupied. In December, 2013 changes really started becoming "real". We ripped out chimneys and walls and floors all in the attempt to make our house sell-able. We hired help...never. People helped and husband prooved his handyman skills.
When our kitchen was gutted, I remember really being stretched. Cooking dinners in the bathroom for two months (things take longer when you do as you have the moola) put me over the edge more times than one. I promised myself that I would NEVER complain about doing dishes in the kitchen again after this. "Stay positive Melissa! You have running water!" kept going through my mind. In the mornings I had to choose to have a good attitude which was hard. My poor husband was working his tail off at work and in our house and I couldn't shake that we were working so hard just to sell our place.
Then in March, 2014 husband started his new job as a branch manager and commuted to his new office 1.25 hrs from our house. This is when my attitude slipped further and further down the crabby lane. His days were so long and I was so tired and I didn't want to be a happy wife when he came home 15 min before the kids go to bed. I'm just being honest here. I believed that this new job came before me and failed to see that he was working for us. For our family and our goals.
To be continued...
Wednesday, April 9, 2014
The Rest of the Story
It was five days after my official birthday. My day went as usual and then at 4pm I heard a knock on the door. My babysitter was here! She came right in and handed me an envelope that said "open me" on the front. Inside, I found a gift certificate for a full body message and pedicure with a little note from the man of the house. "Go to this address. You only have 15 min so leave quickly." Oh my what a surprise this was!
On my way to the spa, I realized that I hadn't even looked at my nasty feet in weeks! It's winter, why bother right? There was no time to do anything about it. I would have to explain to the lady that this was all a surprise. When I sat down for the pedicure, the little lady took one look at my feet and said "Oh wow look at this! You have tiny little specs of dried polish on your toes! Oooohhh, I'm going to take care of this for you! And since you never get these, I traded the polish that you picked for a more fancy one."
Everything was wonderful. After being doted upon for three hours, I left the place where my man was waiting for me outside. He drove us to my favorite fancy cafe where we ate while gazing upon each other's eyes. He explained how he had all this planned for days but since my birthday was on Valentine's day week, the spa was booked. Man, did I feel silly. "You could have said something a few days ago to spare me the sadness!" He just smiled. I know even more now how much he is willing to go through to keep something a surprise.
Things are not always what they seem. But a happy birthday phone call is always appreciated! ;-)
On my way to the spa, I realized that I hadn't even looked at my nasty feet in weeks! It's winter, why bother right? There was no time to do anything about it. I would have to explain to the lady that this was all a surprise. When I sat down for the pedicure, the little lady took one look at my feet and said "Oh wow look at this! You have tiny little specs of dried polish on your toes! Oooohhh, I'm going to take care of this for you! And since you never get these, I traded the polish that you picked for a more fancy one."
Everything was wonderful. After being doted upon for three hours, I left the place where my man was waiting for me outside. He drove us to my favorite fancy cafe where we ate while gazing upon each other's eyes. He explained how he had all this planned for days but since my birthday was on Valentine's day week, the spa was booked. Man, did I feel silly. "You could have said something a few days ago to spare me the sadness!" He just smiled. I know even more now how much he is willing to go through to keep something a surprise.
Things are not always what they seem. But a happy birthday phone call is always appreciated! ;-)
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